I sleep well at night, I
have the help of Trazodone. :D I have NOT rested during the day for three days. Intellectually I know I can't function without resting often. However, sometimes, you can't rest. This statement is not accurate...I can always rest, however, I try to do it all. I STILL need to learn to delegate. :(Volunteering in a State Park provides getting to know other hosts. This time of year, there are 10 hosts working the park. A couple left this morning so we had a potluck last night. The weather threatened rain. We have a pop-up canopy with four sides that can enclose a picnic table. Dwain decided EVERYONE could come to our yard for the potluck. I hurried trying to prepare for company and anxiety kicked in. Dinner was scheduled for 6 pm. Two couples showed up at 4:30 pm. Here I am trying to get ready and wanting to sit down to visit with them. Once they were here, the other hosts came over. They were all here by 5 pm. My heart is beating fast. I can't think straight, darn cognitive issues. I'm feeling tired and defeated. Dwain was fixing chili with corn bread in the dutch oven. I mixed up the corn bread. Then he told me he wanted the recipe doubled. I could feel myself crumbling, wanting to cry. I did mix another batch of corn bread. A change of plans always upset my apple cart then anxiety blows me up. I'm so conscience of how it makes me feel and I fight to be calm. It's a struggle.
